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How to Deal with Perfectionist Coworkers, Controlling Spouses, and Other Demanding People

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Published in Impossible To Please: How To Deal With Perfectionist Coworkers Controlling Spouses And Other Incredibly Critical People

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Impossible to Please: How to Deal with Perfectionist Coworkers, Controlling Spouses, and Other Incredibly Critical People

by Martha Mier

4.4 out of 5

Language	:	English
File size	:	1669 KB
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Print length	:	193 pages
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Do you find yourself constantly feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed in your relationships with perfectionist coworkers or controlling spouses? Are you struggling to set boundaries, communicate effectively, and maintain your own mental health in these challenging situations?

You're not alone. Many people face difficulties in dealing with demanding individuals who strive for perfection or exert excessive control over their lives. While it's impossible to change these people's behavior, there are effective strategies you can employ to protect your own well-being and navigate these relationships with increased confidence and resilience.

Understanding Perfectionist Coworkers

Perfectionist coworkers are individuals who set excessively high standards for themselves and others. They may be overly critical, demanding, and inflexible. Working with them can be challenging, as they often expect perfection from everyone around them, including you.

**Key traits:** Detail-oriented, highly organized, driven by the need for control, intolerant of mistakes
**Impact on relationships:** Can be critical, demanding, and overbearing, creating a stressful and competitive work environment

Dealing with Perfectionist Coworkers

**Set clear boundaries:** Let the perfectionist coworker know what you are and are not willing to do. Explain that you value accuracy but also recognize the importance of efficiency and timeliness.
**Communicate effectively:** Use clear and assertive language to express your needs and expectations. Avoid using defensive or passive-aggressive language.
**Focus on the task, not the person:** When providing feedback, focus on the specific task or project rather than attacking the perfectionist coworker's personal characteristics.
**Seek support:** If you are struggling to deal with a perfectionist coworker, seek support from a trusted colleague, supervisor, or mental health professional.

Understanding Controlling Spouses

Controlling spouses are individuals who exhibit excessive control over their partners' lives. They may use emotional manipulation, intimidation, or threats to maintain their power and dominance. Living with a controlling spouse can have devastating effects on your mental and emotional health.

**Key traits:** Excessive need for control, jealousy, possessiveness, low self-esteem
**Impact on relationships:** Can lead to feelings of isolation, low self-esteem, and anxiety in the controlled partner

Dealing with Controlling Spouses

**Set firm boundaries:** Establish clear limits and consequences for crossing those boundaries. Inform your spouse that you will not tolerate controlling or manipulative behavior.
**Practice self-care:** Prioritize your own mental and physical health. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.
**Seek professional help:** If you are struggling to cope with a controlling spouse, consider seeking therapy. A therapist can provide support, guidance, and strategies for managing the situation.
**Stay safe:** If you feel threatened or unsafe, contact the authorities or seek refuge in a safe place.

General Strategies for Dealing with Demanding People

**Understand their motivations:** Try to understand the underlying reasons for the demanding person's behavior. Are they driven by fear, anxiety, or insecurity?
**Communicate empathy and respect:** Even if you don't agree with their behavior, let the demanding person know that you understand their perspective and respect their feelings.
**Take breaks:** It's important to take breaks to protect your own mental health. Step away from the situation when you need to, and engage in activities that help you relax and recharge.
**Practice self-acceptance:** Remember that you are not responsible for the demanding person's behavior. Accept yourself for who you are, and focus on maintaining your own well-being.

Dealing with demanding people, whether they are perfectionist coworkers, controlling spouses, or others, can be a challenging experience. However, by understanding their motivations, setting boundaries, communicating effectively, and prioritizing your own mental health, you can learn to navigate these relationships with increased confidence and resilience. Remember that you are not alone, and support is available if you need it.

If you are struggling to cope with a demanding person in your life, consider seeking professional help. A therapist can provide support, guidance, and strategies for managing the situation and improving your overall well-being.

Impossible to Please: How to Deal with Perfectionist Coworkers, Controlling Spouses, and Other Incredibly Critical People

by Martha Mier

4.4 out of 5